My blogging world is skewing my perception of the real world

Alright, when I write about fashion, I don’t really write as me most of the time. I mean, it’s under my name, and my fingers are hitting the keyboard, but in my blogging world, I don’t have the kind of budget constraints I experience in real life. I write about $600 shoes and $1500 handbags and designer clothes as if I have a closet full of those items. And, in my mind, I do. My mental closet is KICK ASS.

However, in my real world, I have a few designer pieces (emphasis on FEW), and none of them are the types of designer pieces that were ever worth over $500. Still, I’m finding that my blogging world is starting to interfere with my real world.

All of a sudden, I find myself coveting $800 shoes, and when I see designer heels on sale for $350, I think, “Wow! What a steal!” You know, like the fact that they were previously $800 makes $350 affordable. (It doesn’t, sadly.)

Here’s the thing: What does it even matter? Nobody I spend time with would realize the fact that the cute shoes I’m wearing cost hundreds of dollars. In fact, I wouldn’t notice it on someone else, most likely. I would notice if they were cute, and I would notice if they looked REALLY cheap, but there are a MILLION gorgeous shoes for well under $100, so why the hell would I spend a week’s pay on them?

Has anyone else had this problem? Because, as much as I love scouring the internet and pretend-shopping and looking at designer duds, I’m not going to be in a place anytime soon where that can make up my wardrobe. It’s fun, but it’s a spectator sport for me — much like I shouldn’t jump into a pro football game, I’d better remember to stay out of harm’s way with internet shopping. Sheesh.

So I’m Twittering … apparently

Apparently, I am a sucker for peer pressure. I am now on Twitter. I don’t know the first thing about it or how to use it, but, there you have it. Now, all you people who’ve been pushing me to take this gigantic leap (and you know who you are) — how the hell do I Twitter?

Beauty Hacks is LIVE!

Just in case there’s anyone out there who doesn’t waste spend a large portion of their day reading all my blogs, I thought I would throw in another one: Beauty Hacks! My first post just went live, and I’d loooove some friendly comments.

I’ll only be there once or twice a month, but you have the ability to get involved and post your own goodies — go check it out!

See, I have ALL these REASONS for not being around …

So, I know I haven’t really been around much lately, and I’m really, really sorry. I’d like to say I’ve been swamped, and I have been, kinda, doing things like rebuilding and rehanging a fence door (which is HAAAAARD), and laying pavers for a patio (probably hard, but J did most of it while I was out), and hanging curtains and mirrors and pictures and AAAHHH. Where was I?

The Fourth of July weekend got me behind with work, and there’s no better feeling than starting the month off behind, you know, so I’ve been struggling to catch back up. I’ll do it, and it’ll be cool, but for the first time, I’ve had that feeling of, “Sheesh, this job is TOUGH.” Until now, it’s been all,  “La, di da, I’m getting up today and WRITING and it’s LOVELY and la, di da, di da …” Guess the honeymoon’s over.

But, along those lines, I have a new job to add to my resume! I am a content editor for Beauty Hacks, which is a new division of BlogHer, and it’s fabulous. My post will be the first one (assuming everything is working), and it’s going live tomorrow (Tuesday), so, if you have a minute, check it out and leave nice comments!

But, I’ll give you one guess as to where I HAVEN’T been much — the gym. I have such a hard time keeping multiple important things a priority. Now, who wants to motivate me?

Thoughts on moving … deep thoughts

Have you ever found that you have duplicates of the most random crap when you empty out your house to move? For example, we have two three-hole punches. We Seymours are not really an exceptionally hole-punchy family. In fact, I can’t remember the last time I used one. No, wait, I can — I used ONE of the three holes to punch a hole in something a couple of years ago. And so, why we have TWO three-hole punches is beyond me.

What is also beyond me is why I don’t get rid of one, because I distinctly remember having this same revelation the last time we moved.

And, because you’ve been asking so nicely (or at least most of you have been nice about it … I’m not naming names here, but you know who you are …) here’s a pic of the house:

and another …

Who’s coming to help unpack boxes visit?

We are IN

Well, it only took us one day to get pretty much everything out of the old place and into various areas of the new house. I’ve found dishes and silverware, liquor, and oatmeal so far, and a few other items. And I’m duking it out with the RIDICULOUS cable company because they are evil and they lie and we don’t have internet and probably won’t for at least a decade.

Also, we’re busy cleaning out the old place so it can go on the market TODAY (know anyone who wants a super cute condo in Gainesville?), so once that’s all completed, I’ll be back in full force with PICTURES. Honest!

Moving Day #1

So, we’re going to start moving today, and here’s what we’re dealing with:

In case you can’t tell, it’s shitty and rainy, and in case you forgot, it’s FLORIDA, so it’s still warm, which means that wearing a rain jacket is too hot. This is going to be GREAT.

Patting myself on the back this hard hurts

I have had a fantastic workout week, and I just had to brag. It started on Sunday (as weeks are wont to do), when I hit the gym and did the Power Line, which is a bunch of machines that the gym folks set up for you so you can breeze through, but with other tough exercises in between. And then I did a little cardio (but I don’t remember exactly what, so don’t ask). Anyway, I worked my arms really, really hard.

And then, that night, I got a call from my trainer, Fitz, to see if I could work out Monday at 8:30 a.m. Of course, I said yes, so I ran and kickboxed and did ridiculous ab work. And then she asked if I could come back the next day.

So, the next day, I went back for more torture, and this time she added more running and pull ups. I did five consecutively! Seriously! When’s the last time you tried a pull up? They’re haaard, man!

Wednesday I was on my own, so I went to the gym and did two classes — Abs & Glutes and Step Interval, both of which are wicked challenging on their own, so doing both … let’s just say I was very happy when the clock hit 6:15 and class was over.

Thursday I took off because we were doing all kinds of errands and housey things, but today I was back and ready to rock. I did two fast-for-me miles on the treadmill and 15 minutes on the crazy-scary step mill, and push-ups (some with Rudi on my back), and sit-ups (until Rudi decided I was done and sat on my chest and licked me to death). Rudi is not the best trainer in the world, I have decided.

Anyway, as you can see, I’m pretty proud of myself, and I’ve tried to motivate a couple of my friends because I’m feeling so great. Here’s my open invitation — anytime you do a great workout, feel free to leave a comment telling me all about it. That’s right — I’m giving you the right to brag. Your work will motivate me, and I hope I can return the favor. Now go! Kick your own ass!

The bad before the good

Okay, folks, I have some fabulous news — we’re moving! Not far, just to a different part of town, and into a new, much bigger house! With a fenced yard! As you can imagine, the dogs are very excited (and so are we).

But, you know what that means … MOVING. I really don’t like moving. Don’t get me wrong — I live being in a new space and getting it all set up, but the actual process of moving turns me into the world’s biggest Bitch. That’s right — with a capital B. I don’t know why, but something about it really just makes me get fussy.

It doesn’t last long, but you’d better pray nothing drops on my foot or breaks my nail because GOD HELP ME I will just go nuts. If you’re anywhere in the Southeast, and you hear a ridiculous profanity filled rant early next week, it’ll probably be me.

That being said, I’ll totally get pictures posted of us moving in and me being an enormous ass. Maybe Jared will even want to chime in, who knows? But, in the meantime, if you don’t hear a lot from me, that would be why.

Oh, yeah, and there’s this little thing about being asked to model in a catalog and getting a free trip to NYC, but you’d rather hear about my batshit crazy moving meltdown, I’m sure … right?

Our very own Dog Whisperer

As you may have gathered from some of my previous posts, Rudi the Puppy is not the easiest dog in the world. We’ve done obedience classes and tried to train her at home, but she’s continued to be nearly

impossible to walk on leash and she’s eaten several pairs of shoes. Nice shoes. She’s lucky I’m a vegetarian and didn’t turn her into dinner.

Anyway, I decided that it wasn’t fair to her or me to allow the behavior to continue. I hated taking her for walks because she sucked it was so frustrating, and she didn’t understand what I was so upset about. So, I hired a dog behavioralist to come over and help us out.

Gainesville Canine Academy offers a service where they come out and spend 90 minutes with you and your dog(s) and solve all your problems, and we just finished. It was great. Michelle had Rudi walking easily on a leash within five minutes (less, really), and gave us some cheap, easy ways to make Rudi (and Yuki, for that matter) use her mind.

Turns out that thinking is really hard for dogs. Thinking for, like, 15 minutes for them is like us running hard for 30 — it wears them right out. And, wearing Rudi out means she’s less likely to have the energy to eat my shoes. Which means I will keep her now.

And, believe it or not, Rudi actually learned while we watched. Michelle said she had potential to learn quite a bit, which I probably wouldn’t have guessed to start with but I’m happy to know I ain’t raisin’ no fool.

All this means we have to find challenging ways to feed the dogs. Like making them figure out how to get food out of cereal boxes and juice bottles, which serves another purpose — it’s totally entertaining.